13 Months, 1 Week

This past week was a busy one in the whole mortgage/house hunt front. Yes, that's right, Dan and I are getting down to the seriousness of finding a home that will fit 4 people comfortably. I did say 4. Dan, myself, Lily, and Baby #2 (when that happens). We need to be in a house by the end of September since our lease is up October 1st.

Last Saturday we met with a mortgage banker to get pre-approval and get an idea of what we can afford. Then on Sunday we met a realtor at a house in Levittown to speak with him about what we are looking for. Sunday was a big eye-opener for me as I was doing some research. Not wanting to wait until the realtor called us back - whenever that would be, I decided to take it upon myself to set up an appointment to look at a house. While filling out the form on-line, it asked if we have a buyer's agent. What the heck is a buyer's agent? I had no clue, so I looked that up. It turns out that an Exclusive Buyer's Agent is someone who works exclusively for whoever is buying a home. They do not sell any homes and because of that they work super hard to get the buyer exactly what they are looking for. A regular realtor on the other hand, may only show you listings that he is dealing with because he doesn't want to share his commission with anyone else. Another difference is an Exclusive Buyer's Agent can and will show you properties in any neighborhood you wish. If you go with a regular realtor they can only show you listings in their territory - which may only be one town. At that point, you may be dealing with 2 or more realtors depending on where you want to look.

So, Dan and I met with an Exclusive Buyer's Agent (the owner of Best Buyer's Broker Realty Inc) Tuesday night and we were impressed. We really liked the way this guy handled himself and explained everything in detail. We got the impression that he would not hold anything back - after all, we would be hiring him to find us a home, not sell us one. That makes a huge difference. We signed up with him that evening.

He gets paid the same way as a regular realtor - through the sale of the house. The only difference is we need to give him a $300 retainer. If we don't like what he does for us after the second home we see, he will give that money back to us. I don't see that happening though. He already did a home search for us and gave us a bunch of listings. I emailed him last night to show us three homes we're interested in. Just waiting now to find out what day we're gonna go - probably Sunday if all works out.

If you are looking for a home, Dan and I would highly recommend an Exclusive Buyer's Agent. They will fight to get you the home you want close to or at the price you want. There's no hidden agenda like there may be with a regular realtor who would be first and foremost loyal to the seller not the buyer.

Now, here is the interesting part of our whole house search. I grew up in Levittown. I now want to move back there. Having a family really gives a home buyer a lot to think about when searching for a town to live in.

1. Safe neighborhood. Will I feel comfortable taking a walk with Lily and baby #2 in a stroller?
2. Good school district. How are the test results and how are the schools rated on a scale of 1 to 10 (10 being best)? 
3. Neighbors. Who are the people you will call your neighbors? Do they take care of their home? Their yard? Are they families with children or older people? 

I guess coming from a town like Levittown spoiled me. I base all other towns by it. L-town is fantastic for families. It has a lot of parks and pools. It has really nice homes that can be left as is or built up and/or out. Nice size yards that aren't too close to your neighbors. People tend to take care of their homes and yards. I feel really safe walking the neighborhood. L-town has some of the best schools on Long Island. Both Levittown and Island Trees School Districts are rated 8 out of 10 for the best test scores according to Great Schools. 

Don't get me wrong - there are other towns around that are comparable to Levittown, but I guess I'm partial to L-town having grown up there and knowing the neighborhood really well. If you would have asked me 20 years ago if I would ever want to live in Levittown for the rest of my life, I probably would have said no. Kids can be cruel and I didn't have such a great time in middle school and high school. My best high school experiences happened at BOCES, not my regular high school with the kids I grew up with. So why would I have said yes to live there when I grew up and had a family? But now that I am older, I realize it really doesn't matter where you go to school - unfortunately some kids are cruel no matter what town you live in. I just hope that wherever Dan and I buy a home, Lily and Baby #2 don't get bullied like I did. 

Anyway. Enough about that. 

Wow, I just looked and I have no pictures of Lily for this week. Sorry. I can honestly say though that she looks the same as in last weeks pictures. So there you go.

Some videos from the beginning of the month:

1 Year 1 Month

Dan and I have started the process of trying for baby Gorman #2. Because of my PCOS (polycystic ovary syndrome) Dan and I have to go through the whole fertility process again. That means IUI's (intrauterine inseminations) for however many months until we get those sweet words, "You're pregnant!" As for now though, before we can start that time consuming bit of our (but really mine) lives, I had some genetic testing done. This is something my fertility doctor is doing with all of his patients now. I was not tested 2 years ago when we started this process to get pregnant with Lily. 

Well, it turns out that I am the carrier of 2 rare genetic diseases. Of course, what else is new? It has to be rare if it's for me! Anyway, the 2 diseases are: Segawa Syndrome and Smith-Lemli-Opitz Syndrome. Both are not so good. You definitely do not want to have a child with these diseases. Because I am a carrier I am not affected by these diseases I just carry the gene for them (thanks Mom or Dad - they are inherited genes). This means that if Dan happens to be a carrier of one or both of them there is a 1 in 4 chance of passing the actual disease onto our baby. Fantastic! NOT!!! 

Smith-Lemli-Optz Syndrome has an autosomal recessive pattern of inheritance (1 in 4 children can potentially get the disease). I'm not sure about Segawa Syndrome but I think I remember my doctor said they both were.

So now Dan needs to be tested for them as well. He did a spit test last night (Thursday) and I'm mailing it off today. Yes, a spit test. I almost threw up at the sound of him spitting into this tube. It was gross but needed to be done. There is a 2 week wait now to get his results. In the meantime, we cannot start our IUI process until we know his outcome. 

There are 2 outcomes here (duh). The first is that he is not a carrier of the diseases. Great! No problem, we can start for baby #2 without giving it a second thought. The second outcome, he is a carrier of one or both of them. Shit! This means that we can still try for baby #2 but it will be a different process now. 50% of my eggs are also carriers of these diseases. Fortunately my doctor will be able to tell which ones are by testing them. Once he finds the ones that have the genetic marker for the disease(s), he will separate them and remove them before inseminating me. Sounds high tech and hopefully if that is what we need to do it will be covered under our insurance. BUT, with luck this will not be something we have to do. Dan hopefully is not a carrier of any of these 2 diseases. Fingers crossed!!!

This does not only affect me now, but possibly my brother and 2 sisters. Because I'm a carrier it's possible that they are too. My doctor strongly advised me to let them know to get tested before trying to have a baby. The genetic testing is really expensive - $5,000 without insurance! Yes, that is 3 zeros. If you do have insurance it would be no more than $100 if anything. Crazy! I sent an email to my sibs last night to let them know. 

How does this affect Lily? Well, as of right now, I don't see anything to be concerned about. She doesn't show any signs of the diseases and hopefully Dan's results come back negative  and we can really have a sigh of relief. This does however affect her when she wants to have a baby. She is eventually going to need to have this genetic testing done to see if she inherited the carrier genes. UGH!

Anyway. That's what's going on this week. 

On a lighter note, Lily is now going up to me and Dan and giving us hugs. Only our legs though. Hopefully she works her way up into our arms soon. That will be an awesome moment! 

We have been doing a nightly routine now right before we put Lily down for the night. I change her diaper, with Dan's help. Then I pick Lily up and we have a group hug. Lily LOVES that part!! Then Dan and I kiss to show Lily how to (just a peck on the lips guys - rated G only!!) and then she goes in to kiss Dan then me. We tell her we love her and into bed she goes. I hope that lasts forever. Even when she's 20!

 

Lily's first big snow storm experience - NEMO!!

 Lily's first snow angel!

1 Year / 3 Weeks

Sorry for the 3 week hiatus. I really gotta stop doing that 'cause I forget all that's happened. Umm. OK, well let's see…

Lily is walking - wait, no, she's running all over the place. She thinks "No" is a game that is played whenever she goes to touch the living room lamp, or anything she's not supposed to touch. She actually laughed when I smacked her hand. Yeah, laughed at that and for a moment I thought she wanted me to smack her again. This is going to be fun times, I can see it now!

Lily has been on antibiotics now for a week and an ointment for an abscess she has on her right ankle. How did she get this abscess you ask? I'm asking myself the same question. Who knows? It could be from anything - a bug bite or a scratch that got infected. Luckily (or not so luckily) I know what an abscess looks like, having had 6 myself last year, and brought Lily to the doctor right away. Dan and I are very thankful she didn't need to get it lanced and drained. That would've been painful for Lily and would've left a scar.

I cut my hair into a pixie cut once more. Dan thinks I look soooo much better with the short hair, as do I, but Lily thinks I look funny. She must because I swear to you, she pointed at my hair and laughed. Yes, actually pointed and laughed at me. I might have been upset by this if I didn't think it was astonishingly funny of her to do so. We will have to teach her as she gets older that it is not OK to point and laugh at people. For right now though, it's cute.

This snow storm they have predicted is turning out to be a bust. I was watching the weather station last night and the weatherman actually said that there was absolutely no way this storm won't happen and we will get up to 16" of snow. Uh, well as I look out my window all I can see is some light rain. Stupid weathermen. Maybe the snow will come later tonight as they are now predicting. Whatever. Nemo is a cartoon fish, not a snowstorm. Get it right people!!