This is Lily from our very 1st ultrasound on 6/6/2011, when she was just 5 weeks 4 days old inside my womb, to her 1st birthday on 1/14/2013.
I will be continuing to take monthly photos and will update this video each year.
LILY EMMA
January 13, 2012, I began my 37th week of pregnancy. I knew it was exactly 37 weeks because Dan and I conceived Lily from an IUI (intrauterine insemination) with our fertility doctor. Throughout the pregnancy I was so scared of having another loss that I kept telling her "37 weeks Lily. Just wait 'til at least 37 weeks. You'll be strong enough at 37 weeks." Well, she must have heard me 'cause at exactly 37 weeks my water broke. 1:00pm. I had no clue what was going on. I was in no pain. I had to call my midwife to ask her how I would know if my water broke. The night before I had visited with her and was told I was 1-2cm dilated. Who knew? I felt perfectly fine. My midwife confirmed that, yes, my water did break and I was beginning labor. By about 5pm, both Dan and my mother were urging me to go to the hospital. My contractions were about 5 minutes apart. Once at the hospital my midwife checked me and I was 5cm dilated. Around 8pm I was moved into the labor room. I was 8cm by that point and now feeling the pain in a major way. With all the research I did on how I wanted my birth plan to be, the only thing that remained the same was not having any interventions - no drugs, no epidural, no IV. I didn't have the water birth I so desperately wanted. I didn't birth Lily the way I thought I would, but I birthed her. I did it with only encouragement to help me through it. I screamed, moaned, and cried her out of me. I made sounds that to a passer by must have sounded as if there was either a farm animal in the hospital or a possessed person. The clock was staring down at me and by 12:00 midnight, I went into myself and said "I don't want this pain anymore. I don't want to feel this way anymore. The only person that can make it stop is me. I have to push through this pain. I have to take this pain and give into it. I have to push out my baby. No one is going to help me. I have to do this. I can do this." At 1:00am on January 14th, exactly 12 hours from when my water broke, Lily Emma was born. I was exhausted and I swear if I had tears left after all that I would have cried. She was here. I finally could hold her in my arms.
Now a year later and she's walking into my arms. Where has this year gone. I sometimes get sad when I cradle her in my arms because she's so much bigger now. She's no longer a newborn. No longer a baby. Lily is now a toddler. I am amazed by how much she has grown and amazed by how smart she is at figuring things out. Her personality is perfect. She's funny and smart. She is patient and well behaved. She's a thinker and although she doesn't talk yet, she's always asking questions by pointing and raising the last vowel sound when speaking.
She is our rainbow baby. The most magical sight after a storm. Happy Birthday Lily Emma. You have given Mommy and Daddy the best gift of all - you.
Lily's 1st New Years. Dan and I stayed up to watch the ball drop then we went right to bed. We almost didn't make it. Isn't parenthood great?!
Lily's sleep schedule is all screwed up and we don't know why. We have been co-sleeping now for about a week. When she wakes up around 2:30am we change her diaper and give her a bottle. After that she just will not go back in her crib. I would let her cry it out but she's been doing this really loud and agonizing screechy scream. We share the bedroom with her so at 2:30 in the morning, who wants to hear all that noise? Not us! So we lay her in bed with us and she falls right to sleep. Funny thing is she sleeps so much better in our bed. She hardly moves around. When in her crib, she constantly moves. We think she needs more padding on top of her mattress.
Week 51 - Jan 5 - Jan 11
OK, so Sunday (the 6th) Lily actually slept the night in her crib! She woke up at her use-to-be normal time - 12:30am, for a bottle then right back down in her crib she went until around 6:30am. It's been like that this whole week. I think it's because last Saturday we let Lily cry it out until she fell asleep. It took about 15-20 minutes for her to calm down and 15-20 minutes of Dan and myself being motionless in bed, but she did it. Let's hope she keeps this going.
Purchased a bunch of stuff for Lily for the flight we will be taking in March for my brother's wedding in Key West. We bought her a travel bed that folds up into a flat ring, a travel play tray cover for the snack tray on the plane, a lap harness so Lily will be attached to one of us while on the plane, and a travel harness type high chair (it's just fabric that goes around Lily and the back of a chair). We will need more stuff, but that's good for now.
I also purchased Lily's first umbrella stroller. It's The First Years Ignite stroller. I read a lot of reviews and it seems to be one of the best without paying Maclaren prices. We will be bringing this stroller to Key West with us also.
Update on the stroller: Just got it delivered Thursday night (the 10th) and it is AWESOME! I really love it so far. The fabric is really soft and comfy, the 5-point harness rules, and the canopy is a really great size for an umbrella stroller. It has a smooth ride with 8 large wheels. I also love the pattern. It has a nice parent console and the handles feel good in my hands. It's also tall enough so Dan won't have a problem strolling along with it. It has a 2 position recline that's good and a sturdy foot rest. The best part - it holds up to 50 pounds and is really roomy! I know I just got it and haven't used it yet, but I can't see me hating this stroller. I just hope it holds up on the plane ride to Key West in 2 months. The airline did say that I can wheel Lily right onto the plane with it and they will store it in their closet right by the door so it should be fine. Here's hoping!
THIS IS THE BEST BULLET OF THE WEEK: Lily took not 1, not 2, but about 10 steps right into my arms Thursday night!!!!!! I was so proud of her that I cried. I literally broke down and couldn't control myself. I was so happy and sad at the same time. Happy because she did it but sad because my baby is growing up so quickly. As soon as she can walk on her own she will be the most independent she's been ever and it sorta makes me feel less needed as a mom. Of course that's the stupidest thing to think because she is still a baby - only turning 1 on Monday the 14th, but that's what I was thinking. It's so weird how a woman without kids will think that a baby walking - really walking for the first time is "cool" and "yay for the baby", but a mom who will still think it's cool and yay for the baby will also be sad because it means her baby isn't going to be a baby for that much longer. People without kids will never understand that feeling. I didn't until I had Lily. Being a parent means your brain is now functioning completely different than before you were a parent. And unless you are a parent, you will never, ever be able to truly understand why I cried, well, like a baby.
Went back to see our fertility doctor today (Friday the 11th). I went so I can find out about testing and stuff for when Dan and I want to start trying for baby #2. I need to do IUI (intrauterine insemination) again. Sucks, but if that means a less likelihood of miscarriage I'm all for it. I don't ever want to go through that again, especially now that I have Lily to take care of. So while at the office, I got started on some testing. Things checked out OK today. I'll need to get blood drawn, Dan too, and then have another SHG (Sonohysterogram) done to make sure my uterus is normal. It wasn't last time and I needed to get surgery. I really hope it checks out this time.
Video of the week
Just skip the beginning and go to 1 minute. Lily does her hip jive dance!
I'm not slacking on the pics, I just am slacking on uploading them to my computer. Sorry.
