It's the Simple Things

The Creation of Adam starring Lily Emma as God

I had some fun with Photoshop yesterday. Lily was in the perfect pose to replace God in Michelangelo's The Creation of Adam.

Daddy's Girl

I am sad that Dan had to go back to work so soon after Lily's arrival. He went back on Tuesday. I wish he was able to take the full two weeks he had planned on but it's too busy at his job right now. Oh well. 

                                      

Lily had her first doctors visit last Friday. She weighed in at 7 lbs 3 oz and 20 inches. Now, I know babies do lose weight after birth so I wasn't surprised by the fact Lily lost almost a pound, but how does one grow a whole inch in less than a week? Someone measured wrong or our baby has a growing problem! The doctor said that everything looks good except for a small hernia in her belly button. Nothing to be concerned about and it should go away on its own within a couple of months. 

We went back for another weight check last Monday and Lily only gained an ounce. Now weighing 7 lbs 4 oz, Dr. Cheruvanky seemed a little concerned. Lily should be back up to her birth weight so she is now primarily drinking my breast milk in a bottle where we can see exactly how much she's taking in. It actually works out better for me because Lily was using me as a pacifier. It would take her an hour or more to feed and she never wanted me to put her down. Now that we are giving her bottles, she finishes and falls asleep where I can put her down and she doesn't wake up. Lily's eating a lot more now too. After 2 oz of milk, she wants more. We're almost up to 3 oz at a time and she's up to eat every 2 to 3 hours. We go for another weight check tomorrow and hopefully Lily put on more weight.

Lily was fascinated by her Uncle K.C. She couldn't take her eyes off of him. I think it was the beard. This is the first baby my brother has held for a while since my cousin Shelby. Shelby is 16 years old, so it definitely had been a while. As K.C. was holding her, in the My Uncle Rocks onesie he bought for her, she let loose - literally. She kept farting and did a poo in his arms. It was funny. 

Look Alike 

A lot of my family thinks that Lily looks like my sister Krissy, but if you take a look at my baby picture and compare it to Lily, she looks a lot like me. Which is not surprising since she is my daughter!

We Welcome Lily Emma Gorman

Lily Emma Gorman

Born at 1:00 am on Saturday, January 14, 2012

8 lbs 2.2 oz, 19 inches

The long hard journey is over and we finally have the baby we've always wanted. The way we got here seems like a distant memory now and I can move on. Welcome little tiger Lily to our family.

The Labor and Birth

Thursday, January 12, 2012 - 37 Weeks pregnant

Nothing out of the ordinary happened all day Thursday. No pain, no discomfort. Dan and I headed to our appointment with our midwife, Dale, for our weekly checkup. Since Dale had to give me a Group B Strep test and a Chlamydia test (hospital needed it on record that I don't have these things), I asked Dale to give me an internal exam. She wasn't even going to do it until our next appointment, but I asked, so she did. Dale said Lily's head was "right there" and I was already 1 to 2 cm dilated. She stripped my membranes and told me to get some herbal pills to get me ready for labor. Dale expected that I would go into labor within the next week.

Friday, January 13, 2012 - 37 Weeks, 1 Day pregnant

I got a pretty good nights sleep. I only woke up twice, which surprised me since I was always waking up every 1 to 2 hours throughout the night. I felt a little crampy, but nothing that was really bothersome. I finished writing and posted my blog for that week around 12:45 pm. At 1:00 pm I was getting into the shower and felt something wet on my thighs. I sat down on the toilet and gush! OK, what just happened? I didn't notice anything else come out at that point, but I called Dale to ask how I would know if my water broke. She said that I would be gushing water almost constantly. I said I wasn't and I had no pain, so she told me to just go about my day and call her if anything changed. When I got off the phone with her, I called Dan at work and gave him the heads up. 

I got into the shower and before I turned the water on gush… gush! Uh oh! I think my water definitely broke, maybe. All I could think was that I won't be able to do the water birth because my test results wouldn't be back for another three or four days. I continued to take a shower. When I finished, Dale called me and said that the test she did for Chlamydia was wrong and asked me if I would be able to go to the midwife in Medford to get it done again. I said I could, since I wasn't 100% now that my water had broken. Since the shower, nothing was coming out. I got dressed and made my way out to the car. Then, I headed back in to the apartment. All the way to the car, every time I took a step gush… gush… gush! OK, my water really did break and I was going to have a baby.

I called Dale to tell her my water did actually break. That was at 2:30 pm and she said that it could take 12 to 24 hours before anything really happens. She told me she had a meeting in Farmingdale at 7:00 pm and she would stop by to check on me after, around 7:30 pm. I called Dan and told him not to rush home. I still wasn't feeling any pain. Dan said that he would take the earlier train home so he would get here around 4:00 pm. I then called my mom. She said that she would come over right away. I told her she didn't have to, but she insisted.

My contractions started around 4:00 pm. I didn't know what they were supposed to feel like, so I wasn't quite sure if they really were contractions. They weren't painful, just a little tightening in my lower abdomen. My mom told me I should start keeping track and writing sown the times and length of the contractions. They started out by being 20 minutes apart. By 5:30 pm they were about 5 minutes apart. By 6:00 pm they were about every 2 to 3 minutes. At 6:30 pm, Dan and my mom insisted that I call Dale to let her know. I didn't want to bother her, since I knew she was going to be at the apartment within an hour, but I called. She said that she would skip the meeting and come straight over or she could just meet us at the hospital. I opted for her just to come by until 6:30 pm came around. Now the contractions were painful. We left for the hospital around 7:00 pm. 

When we got to the hospital, we went up to the labor and delivery floor. Dale was already there and got me set up to be monitored for about 20 minutes. They needed to draw blood and make sure my blood pressure was good and that Lily's heart rate was at a good pace for the water birth. I was checked to see how far along I was and it turned out I was already 5 cm dilated. Halfway there! When asked on a scale of 1 to 10 how bad the pain was, I said about a 5. That was at 8:00 pm. At 9:00 pm they advised me that Lily's heart rate was good, but she wasn't awake enough to do the water birth. They moved me to the labor room and checked me again. I was 8 cm dilated and by this point, the pain was at an 8. I was dilating quickly and by 11:00 pm I was dilated 10 cm. 

I have always said that I wanted to experience labor and birthing my baby. I did not want any drugs, no pain killers, no epidural. Oh, I experienced labor alright! Geez!! To tell you the pain was unbearable is not enough. The pain I felt was like nothing I have ever imagined or want to again. I screamed so hard I lost my voice and bruised my bronchioles, making it very difficult to breath when I stood up. I bruised the side of my right hand and forearm by hitting the side of the hospital bed as I screamed out, "fuck, Fuck, FUCK!!!" I was giving up. I kept saying that I just wanted Lily out and I didn't care how they would do it, I wasn't gonna do it by myself anymore. Unfortunately, once you're in labor, there's no going back. Once you hit 10 cm and your baby's head is popping out, there is nothing that will stop the pain until your baby is pushed out. I had to be strong. I had to get Lily out or the pain would last longer. It took everything I had inside of me to push her out. At 1:00 am, Lily was out of me and laying on my stomach - all 8 pounds 2.2 ounces of her! 

After the birth, my mom came into the room and told us that everyone could hear me scream clearly from the other side of the wall. That's how loud I was. When I was being wheeled out to go to my room, I asked the labor nurse if I scared any of the other women who were there to give birth. She said, "No comment." Then I asked how many women she sees who give birth without an epidural. She said, "Very few, almost all women will have an epidural." I was proud of myself for not getting one and doing it all on my own. With that said, I don't know if I'll do it again. I know from this experience that I am strong enough to do it, but to go through that amount of pain again is scary.

It took exactly 12 hours from the time my water broke to deliver our baby girl. It took 9 hours from the time I started having contractions. It took 2 hours of pushing once I was 10 cm dilated. All in all, it didn't take very long and I am so thankful for that. I am so thankful that our Lily Emma is healthy and strong. We took her home on Monday, January 16, 2012.

Dan and I are parents. I am finally a Mommy. We are a family!

Full Term

OK, we've reached 37 weeks and Lily is considered full term! She can come at any point now and all will be fine.

I went to get an ultrasound done on Tuesday per the request of my midwife, Dale. Last week when she measured my belly it was higher up in size than what she was expecting. We were going to wait until this week to see if the measurements equaled out before actually getting the ultrasound, but Dale was speaking with her colleges at the hospital and they all thought it best for me to go in as soon as possible to get checked out.

A few things that concerned them was:

1. Since I have lymphedema and retain a lot of fluid and protein in my legs, they wanted to make sure that wasn't causing a problem with the measurements in my belly
2. They wanted to make sure I didn't have more amniotic fluid than normal
3. They wanted to see the weight and length of Lily to make sure she isn't getting too big

Since I had to make the appointment ASAP, Dan was not able to go so my mother went with me to the hospital instead. We got to see Lily on the screen and she looked perfect! Chubby cheeks and all!! They estimated her weight to be 8 lbs 1 oz. There was a little more amniotic fluid than normal, but because of Lily's size and how far along I am, they said it wasn't anything to be too concerned about. Whew! That's good to hear.

Dan and I saw Dale last night (Thursday) for our weekly checkup and she confirmed that Lily is doing great. She tested me for Strep-B and chlamydia. I don't have chlamydia but the hospital needs the results on record so I can do the water birth. Since I was "in position" so to speak, Dale did an internal exam and said Lily is in a great position. I am already 1-2 cm dilated and labor can happen within the week! She stripped my membranes to try and get my cervix more ready for labor. Dale is concerned about the amniotic fluid, Lily growing too large, and the effect it could have on my lymphedema the longer the pregnancy continues. I want as natural a labor as possible so this may help move things along so I don't have to be induced with drugs. She also has me on some herbal remedies which could induce labor within a week. They are: Caulophyllum, Cimicifuga, and Belladonna. If I don't go into labor by next Thursday (our next appointment) I'll be getting another ultrasound done to make sure the amniotic fluid has not risen. 

Since I want to breastfeed Lily for at least a year, I had some concerns and wanted to learn more about it. My mother and aunts all had problems breastfeeding and all I've heard were horror stories of how much it hurts and how I probably won't be able to do it because of my fair skin tone. I brought this up to my midwife a couple of weeks ago and she lent me a book - The New Bestfeeding: Getting Breastfeeding Right for You: The Illustrated Guide. I read the book cover to cover and loved it so much I just ordered it. The edition I ordered is a newer version of the book so I'm excited to read it again to see what the new information is. The newer version of the book is pictured above. 

The book explains that it's all about positioning of you and the baby in order to get breastfeeding right. It also explains that no matter what, breastfeeding should never hurt as long as the positioning is right. I decided to buy the book as a reference for when Lily gets here. The book has a lot of pictures and illustrations that make it easier to understanding how to breastfeed. The book should be delivered by the end of next week. Let's see who gets here first: Lily or the book!

Getting Prepared

Happy New Year! 2012 will be one to remember. 

Dan and I started our New Year off by shopping for Lily. There was still a lot we initially needed for her when she arrives so we printed out our registry and purchased most of the items we would need right away (within the first couple of months). Things like bed sheets, nail clippers, pack 'n play, among others. Just like our wedding registry, we got 10% off of everything we purchased. It was a good shopping trip 'cause we ended up paying about $62 for A LOT of stuff since we had the 10% off, a 20% off coupon, money from Christmas, and buybuy Baby gift cards from Christmas.

On Monday we went over my parent's house just to hang out and have dinner (I SWEAR MOM, THAT WAS OUR INITIAL INTENT!). After looking at all of Lily's things, I decided we should split Lily's laundry load so we brought over all her bedding, towels, and bibs to wash. My parents have an awesome washer and dryer so they offered them up for the initial wash of things. This weekend we'll be going back over to do all of her clothes. While we were there, we decided to also put the base to the infant car seat in my car. It's weird to see it there. Ahhh! I'm having a baby!!

Sticking with the "nesting" phase of the pregnancy, I put away all of the things we washed and re-arranged the things on her book shelves. I even got the diaper bag set up with diapers and wipes. Dan and I also made Lily's crib up with the cute bedding set and mobile. It's becoming more real every day. Any week now we'll have a little baby girl and I won't have this beach ball of a belly that moves around like something out of the movie Aliens. I'm gonna miss that. I love the feeling of her moving around inside of me.

36 weeks today and hoping that Lily holds out for at least one more week. It seems possible, although the past couple of nights have been somewhat hard with Braxton Hicks contractions. I also feel that my belly is heavy. Just more pressure on my bladder or something. Just gotta keep telling Lily, "One more week. One more week." If she comes earlier I won't be able to have the water birth I've been wanting.